I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize