i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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