whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize