it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize