Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
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