idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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