I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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