I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
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