you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
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Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
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You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
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