from now on my penis is your penis
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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