Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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