I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize