How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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