you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
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Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize