If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
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Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
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Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
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