Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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