I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
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