I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize