Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
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I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
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THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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