He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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