the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
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