I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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