Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I could fuck to npr.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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