Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
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At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
And then he peed in my hair
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