A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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