Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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