We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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