Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Randomize