I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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