kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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