So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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