The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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