I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
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so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
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Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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