Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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