sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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