Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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