This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize