Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize