Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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