Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
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