so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
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