does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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