Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
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