SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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