Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize