I can't breathe out the right side of my face
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
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