Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize