Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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