Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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