I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
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